wad a stupid question! firstly u cant be mi. and secondly, i already noe ur ans to the ques. 99.9999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999% will say NO! haiz. tot abt this question over n over again. somehow there push n pull factors frm both sides. poly pull factors: get to study in sth i'm interested in. more practical, less theory. no pw. n most imptly, NO GP! push factors: dunno if i can adapt to and whether i will like life in a poly. pple told mi life in poly is very different. hav to b very self motivated. *its gonna be my target!* jc pull factors: I AM DEFINITELY GG TO MISS AJC AND ALL MY FRIENDS THERE!*major major factor!* jc got more chances to go uni lah. tt 1 every1 aso noe lah. push factors: i'm presently taking a subj combi that i feel will lead mi to nowhere. pcm. no link to my interest lah. i tink my interest is still wif bio but i dun tink i can cope wif bio in jc level lah.. every1 is saying is how n how difficult and i already had a hard time mermorise-ing all e facts last yr lah.. nearly went crazy. dun wanna go thro tt again. plus still need to cope wif GP n PW, i tink i'll die!
wad happened the past few days was this ..
last wk i received a letter frm sp. thinking tt its gg to tell mi if my appeal was successful, i quickly open the letter. den there write wad can onli noe the appeal results in mid-may. i was like WAD? so late. den how i catch up? den i was tinking mayb by tt time i shld stay in jc instead. i tot, mayb i shld leave everything to God.
np's appeal was the deciding 1. so i jus waited. days n days i cont to go aj, mugged n play n joke ard. den sat i had guitar den after tt hp got 2 miss call. like house no but dnno hu. tt nite mi sis ask mi whether np pple got call mi anot den i tot of the 2 calls. think is den. so i waited for them to call mi again lah. sun there was nth. so i had to do my PI for pw. did PI until 2am lah. den today went sch as usual. 0720 went i n company was rushing to sch. there was an sms. the first thing i tot, shit! nv put silent mode! den again i tot, who will sms at this time?! weird. saw the msg n i jumped with joy! the msg goes:" pei jun, yr appeal 4 ngee ann poly's biomedical sc is sud\ccessful. are u accepting the offer? Doris/NP" showed se n company the msg den they quite sad lah.. den whole day i wasnt even listening any lecture or tutorials lah.. my heart wasnt there at all. kept thinking abt whether i should accept. once i accept there is no turning back le. but at tt time i still hav a choice. decided to accept tt offer at abt noon liddat. althou i noe alot of pple will b upset wif my decision. i hard heartedly accepted the offer....
i noe this decision would meant alot of things. it would mean i wont be able to see all my very very good friends in aj. alot of pple dun wan mi to go to poly. tt i noe. sometimes, thinklng abt tt jus makes mi wan to cry. sometimes i feel so lost. like no one's there for mi, no one supports mi. i think abt wad my friend said, who do u wan to look for when u are in poly n u encounter problems? at least in jc u hav us.. ya i noe. i dun wan to lose u guys aso! somehow i feel that i abandon u guys lah(by making this decision). den the day will cum when u guys abandon. i scared. really scared. that 1 day, i turn to my sides n there is no one there for mi. i dunno if my decision is correct. . i dun wan to think abt it. i am afraid the more i think abt it the more i will regret. i may hav disappoint alot of pple. i'm really sorrie. but this decision decides wad i would b in future. n betwteen my friends n future, i would chose my future. u may think i'm selfish. but i hav to be realistic n rational. i dun wan to b stuck wif doing sth i dun like in future for the rest of my life!
haiz. leaving aj in early May. really gonna miss alot of pple. i noe i'm gonna miss shu jun seok mui ser kun zhiwei fungi sze ern yingwei serxing kiente lily xin yi shu pak yen hao zhenyu de hai teh ernest alethea qi cai kah hoe jie hao chin thin cheng wee sarah anna esther pang esther toh pei sian yan ping soke yee lai ping izhar jia hui xin yu xi er jeremy celine kerrin weizi darren wan hui jia sheng michelle angeline valerie jia yi ophe ritchie Isz berton wei shan pei shan seok bryan siew hoon fiona shu hui yee whang zhi qi jun da xiu hua wan lin wei hui and the happy times i had in aj. i jus wan to say thank you to these pple for making my stay in aj a memorable 1. nv tot i could make so many great friends within a such a short period of time. being wif them jus make mi feel so comfortable. pple, thnx for letting mi noe u cared. that really touched mi. i nv knew pple cared so much. really. thnx frm the bottom of my heart...
